Wondering
Where the FUCK is my period? Day three of the little green pills, and no sign of Aunt Flow. I followed the directions perfectly. If I’m pregnant, I’m running my car into Lake Washington at full speed....
View ArticleAnother Vaginalogue
While I was in Tucson last week, I had a bit of an epiphany. I am done having kids. As in, this baby factory is CLOSED. Forever and ever. Amen. You see, despite everything I have been through mentally...
View ArticleA Bitch About Postpartum Articles
Yesterday I got a email from one of those annoying websites that send you an update EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, and I almost threw something at it until I remembered not to punish...
View ArticleFour Years Ago Today
Exactly four years ago, I was in the midst of a 26-hour labor, after which the child known as “Julie” emerged from my screaming, torn vagina. It all started with my water breaking three weeks early the...
View ArticleMy Thoughts on Co-Sleeping
I’m probably gonna open a can of worms with this one, so let them slither out freely. I don’t care what other parents choose to do, but I personally would never sleep with my kids, and I have very...
View Article“Old”
It used to be that if you get pregnant over 35 you were considered a “high risk” pregnancy. Higher chance of twins, miscarriage, unhealthy shit, and babies born with disabilities. In fact, 30 was kind...
View ArticleSearch Term Winner of the Day
“Vagina looser after giving birth” Yes, my blog got pulled with that search. Gee, I wonder why. Let’s ponder. Sigh. Sweetheart, I’m sorry you’re struggling with this. Yes, after a watermelon tears...
View ArticleSadness
A week or two ago, one of my cyber friends posted pictures of her beautiful 1-month-old baby along with a caption that read how she couldn’t believe how fast the time had gone and that it’d been the...
View ArticleBirth: When a Baby Pops out of Your Vag
The number one fact that I get bizarre reactions to: “I gave birth at home.” The most common reaction I get: “What do you mean you gave birth at home?” The snide answer that sometimes erupts: “As in, a...
View ArticleGoodbye, Wonderful Person
This weekend, something horrible happened amidst the excitement of my beautiful daughter’s 6th birthday and the great visit with my family, who flew up here to celebrate Julie’s special day. My...
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